Promise that you're not
going to f**k any Italians.
Why are you saying that?
- Or some gringo backpacker?
- Disgusting!
- Maybe a French fag?
- No!
How about a dirty Mexican...
...selling bracelets on the street?
Tenoch!
Nobody else!
Of course nobody else.
- Promise me.
- I promise.
What?
- You know.
- Know what?
I promise...
...that I'm not going to f**k any...
...Chinamen!
- Don't bulls**t me!
- Don't you trust me?
- Sure I do.
- So?
- Promise me.
- What about you?
Okay, I promise, too.
Prove it.
Together.
One...
...two...
...three.
I promise...
...l won't...
...f**k...
- ...any Brazilians...
- ...any...
- ...Germans...
- ...Argentineans...
- ...Poles.
- ...Venezuelans.
Irish.
- Your father!
- Don't mess with me!
Ana's mother, a French divorcee...
...taught at the Learning Institute for Foreigners.
She did not object to Tenoch
sleeping with her daughter.
For Julio it was different. He could
stay with Cecilia only until dinner...
...and had to come back in the morning
for the trip to the airport.
Cecilia's father,
a pediatrician specializing in allergies...
...thought his daughter's relationship
with Julio had gone too far.
Her mother, a Lacanian psychologist,
saw it differently.
She believed their relationship was innocent.
I can't believe it! She lost her passport!
She'll miss her plane!
Julio, come up! Help me find my passport!
Go on! We're in a hurry!
Why aren't you getting the car?
- Hurry, close the door!
- What about your passport?
It's here, stupid!
Come on, baby. Hurry!
What a nice goodbye!
Are you going out tonight?
No way, baby...
...I’ll be missing you too much.
- We have to leave now, Cecilia!
- Your mom!
Come! I want to take a little of you with me!
The plane will leave without you.
Move! Move!
Did you find the passport?
- Found it!
- Great!
- Hi, Maru.
- Hi.
- Where's Esteban?
- I haven't seen him, Nicole.
Let's check in, Ana!
What's up, Charolastra?
I hate this goodbye bulls**t.
Why don't they just go?
I'll miss her, but this is too much.
- What's up, boys?
- Hey there.
- I heard you flunked.
- Right.
- Princess.
- Dad, you came!
Ana's father was a journalist
who recently became a politician.
He worked for the opposition government
in Mexico City...
...as the Director of Logistics
in the Department of Culture.
Although he liked Tenoch,
he referred to him as "the Preppie"...
...but never in front of his daughter.
- I can't wait to be on that plane!
- I want to be there already!
- I don't want you to go.
- I'm going to miss you so much!
I don't want to go, sweetie.
Smells like bread.
You pig!
Enjoy my graduation present!
You should have flunked!
Don't be a baby.
So, did your old man get pissed?
He freaked!
If I don't take Economics, he'll take my car!
You'd give up our car...
...for a f**king course?
f**k economists, man!
Those pricks can suck my d*ck.
You're an idiot.
f**k you. I'm going to be a writer.
Switch to Lit with me, man.
No f**king way!
f**king traffic!
I bet my sister's in another demonstration.
They're in the right, Charolastra.
And I'm in the right to tell them to f**k off!
I guess.
But left- wing chicks are hot, dude.
Totally.
Are you wearing cologne?
You f**king pig!
Open the window!
On that day, three demonstrations
took place across the city.
Nevertheless, the traffic jam
was caused by Marcelino Escutia...
...a migrant bricklayer from Michoacan.
Marcelino was hit by a speeding bus.
He never used the pedestrian bridge,
because its poor location...
...would force him to walk
two extra miles to his work site.
The Red Cross took his unidentified body
to the city morgue.
It took four days for the corpse to be claimed.
Tenoch Iturbide
was the second of three children...
...born to a Harvard-trained economist...
...Secretary of State...
...and a housewife who attended
various spiritual seminars.
His parents considered naming him Hernan...
...but he was born the year
his father joined the ruling party...
...and affected by a sudden nationalism...
...he opted to give his son
an Aztec name, Tenoch.
...he opted to give his son
an Aztec name, Tenoch.
Once we're stoned, we'll drop a little "E."
I got some from Frisco, I'm telling you...
- ...fuckin' A!
- Total organic s**t.
If Miriam comes,
I'll slip it into her sweet little thing....
Miriam is a total babe!
At the party, man, she was walking around...
...rubbing her a** against me.
Truth is, she's kind of slutty.
The one I want to nail is Shorty's chick.
She's got these little titties....
She's a total prime babe!
Not inside, man. Let's go to the tower.
- What's wrong with here?
- They'll smell it, a**hole!
Sticky.
A little harsh.
Crons?
Just some dog s**t. Total Cheech and Chong.
- Tenoch!
- Get down!
- Hello, Mrs. Iturbide.
- Hello, Julio, how are you?
- Hi, Mom.
- Hello, sweetheart.
What's going on? You seem strange.
Are you sad?
Must be your girlfriends.
Don't worry. They're not really gone.
Your auras transcend the physical plane.
Julio, are you coming to Jessica's wedding?
Of course! I wouldn't miss it.
You have to dress up, okay?
The President is coming.
Get rid of that cigarette.
Good evening, ma'am.
Your garden totally rules.
I didn't know you were here, Saba.
I'm everywhere.
That night, Julio and Tenoch
consumed alcohol...
...marijuana, and ecstasy
imported from San Francisco...
...and failed in their dating strategies.
They worried this failure would be
the blueprint for the rest of the summer.
At 4:00 a.m., Julio vomited in the street.
Around 5:00 a.m., Tenoch smashed
his headlight on the way home.
At dawn, Saba had his first experience
with group sex.
A week went by,
and boredom became their daily routine.
Tenoch's father
served on the board of a country club...
...so his son had access
to the facilities on Mondays...
...when the club was closed for maintenance.
One, two, three!
You don't pace yourself, man,
that's why you run out of breath.
Like you're the pro.
You beat me by less than two meters.
Two? I'd say ten!
- Maybe four.
- Let's call it eight.
You're full of s**t.
I may be full of s**t...
...but you've got one ugly d*ck.
Looks like a deflated balloon.
So blow it up, a**hole!
Back off, faggot!
- Come on, blow the balloon!
- Back off!
Six, seven...
...eight, nine, ten, eleven!
There are more bodyguards than guests!
Count them! The Perez family brought two,
the Guerreros three...
...two for my dad's boss...
...and a shitload for the President.
- Don't forget Herminio.
- Shut up, he's my driver.
But he packs a gun, man.
Smart move, sir. Your son is getting trashed.
Come on, Dad.
I already said hi to the President.
The Gonzalez kids are looking for you.
Be nice to them. It's important.
Sure, Dad.
The Gonzalezes! Remember that fat girl?
How are you, sweet pea?
What a bunch of a**holes, right?
A rum and Coke, light on the Coke.
Do you remember your cousin?
He wants to be a writer, too.
I'll let you two catch up. Cheers!
That poor dog.
Last time we met, you were mourning...
...the loss of a Ninja Turtle.
- It was a Thunder Cat.
- Right, whatever.
So you want to be a writer?
And tell stories about rich brats?
No, about a**holes like you.
It's one thing to write cute stories.
It's another to create literature.
- So when do you start?
- Did you read my book?
- I read the reviews.
- Critics are a**holes.
Alejandro Montes de Oca, "Jano",
was the nephew of Tenoch's mother.
His father died when he was 3,
leaving him to his mother's care.
He escaped her excessive attention
by going abroad for a degree.
He was now back after 10 years.
Think about it.
Do you really want to be a writer?
Anybody can spell...
...but it takes a lifetime to be a writer.
This is my cousin, the writer.
It's not only about discipline and technique.
You've got to create your own style.
You need life experiences...
...and honestly,
what do you really know about life?
Yeah, what do you know?
Little bastards!
I'm sorry.
I thank you all for joining us
in this humble celebration.
In particular, the President
of our country and his lovely wife...
...who took time from his busy schedule...
...to share this special moment with us.
Your presence is a testimony
of your enormous modesty.
And with the permission of you all...
...l would like to wish the bride
and the groom every happiness.
- Hello, nice to meet you.
- Hi.
- Hello.
- How's it going?
Is this boring or what?
- No.
- Come on!
A little boring.
Where are you from?
From Madrid, Spain.
Cool! What brings you here?
My husband is in the family.
On which side?
On the bride's side.
Can you believe what they did to my suit?
You little prick!
Luisa Cortes lost her parents
in a car accident when she was 10.
She was brought up by her great-aunt,
a Franquista spinster who became sick...
...and Luisa had to take care of her
for the last five years of her life.
Luisa lived with her until she was 20,
when she married Jano.
Four months later, her aunt died.
She had been her last living relative.
What happened?
Those two brats.
You can't meet the President like this.
A little salt will take it out.
- No, you need a new suit.
- A little salt.
Come with me!
Here, hold this.
Keep an eye out for my mother.
Is that your husband?
Yes, why?
Oh, nothing, he's my cousin.
What's your name?
Tenoch.
You're little Tenoch?
I met you years ago.
You were crying
because you lost your Thunder Cat.
You've got a good memory! Cigarette?
Thank you. Gosh, you're a man now.
Thank you. So, how long have you been here?
About a month.
Jano's teaching at the University.
You plan on doing any traveling?
Jano's leaving for a symposium...
...but I'm staying to fix up the house
and to look for a job.
But if we find the time,
I'd love to go to the beach. And you?
- We're going to the beach.
- To Puerto Escondido, right?
- Jano told me it was beautiful.
- That place sucks.
- It's not beautiful?
- No, a bunch of yuppie backpackers...
...and wanna- be surfers.
We know a beach nobody knows about.
What's it called?
- Heaven's....
- Mouth?
Heaven's Mouth! Totally.
It's like paradise!
Better than paradise.
It's a slice of heaven right here on earth.
A tropical heaven...
...putting down roots on earth.
She should come with us.
Why don't you come?
Me? You'd take me along?
- Of course.
- Is there a place to sleep?
Plenty of warm sand...
...underneath a roof of stars.
We can drink coconuts...
- ...and bring some forties.
- What's that?
Big bottles of beer.
Jano will love the idea.
The Mariachis!
The President left an hour later.
He had an urgent meeting
with the leaders of his ruling party...
...to appoint the candidates
for the upcoming national elections.
The next day...
...he would express his outrage
about the Cerro Verde massacre...
...and deny that the State Governor
was involved with the tragedy.
After offering condolences
to the victims' relatives...
...he would fly to Seattle
to a conference on globalization.
The days passed,
and while Jano was away at a symposium...
...Luisa went to the doctor
to get the results of some tests.
In the waiting room,
she did a magazine quiz titled:
"Are You A Fully Realized Woman?"
Answering by multiple choice...
...she chose "B" for question 1.
"Prefers being awake
rather than sleeping or dreaming."
For 4, "C." "Values time more highly
than money or power."
For 7, "A." "Thinks more about the present
than the past or the future."
She scored 16 points.
The magazine defined her as a woman
who is afraid to accept her freedom.
Luisa did not agree.
Think about Conchita's titties.
Those hard nipples.
Nice!
Mayela's p*s*y. Her wet little bush.
- How about your girlfriend's mom?
- f**k off!
- That art teacher....
- Ms. Georgina.
She never wore panties.
- Salma Hayek!
- Salmita....
- Your cousin.
- What cousin?
The Spanish chick.
Hello?
Hello?
-My love.
- Jano!
Are you okay?
I'm so drunk.
Go to sleep, we'll talk tomorrow.
I'll be back in two days. I love you so much.
I love you, too.
I'm an a**hole. I'm a piece of s**t.
Go to sleep, you're drunk.
I'm a s**t.
Calm down. What's wrong?
Are you okay?
I slept with another woman.
What?
I'm telling you, I'm a piece of s**t.
Why are you telling me this?
I love you so much.
I made your sandwich.
It has your favorite cheese.
Thanks, Leo.
Hello? One moment, please.
It's for you, darling.
Hello?
Hi Tenoch, it's Luisa.
- Who?
-Luisa, from Spain.
Yes. How are you?
I'm glad I caught you.
Are you still leaving today?
- Where?
-To Heaven's Mouth.
Yes. We're leaving this afternoon.
- And you're all ready?
-We're working on it.
I was wondering....
Is the invitation still open?
- Hello? I guess not.
-It’s just that....
- It's okay, don't worry.
-No. Yes, come!
I don't want to bother you.
It's cool. Just tell us where to pick you up.
I live at 52 Machu Picchu Street, Apartment 3D.
- Hello?
-Still sleeping, you lazy f**k?
I was up all night watching videos.
Get your a** moving. We're going to the beach.
- What beach?
-Heaven's Mouth.
It doesn't exist.
I know, but Luisa wants to go.
- Luisa who?
-The Spaniard.
Are you kidding?
Not at all! We need your car.
No way. It won't make it, the radiator's fucked...
...plus it's my sister's turn to use it.
Let's take yours.
My dad took it away
'cause of the broken headlight...
...and for not taking Economics.
What a prick!
Julio Zapata lived with his mother and his sister.
He had not seen his father since he was 5.
His mother was a secretary in a corporation...
...where she had been working all her life.
His sister, Manuela,
was a Political Science major...
...at the National university of Mexico,
and a left-wing activist.
After a difficult negotiation,
Julio managed to borrow the car for five days.
Then she would get it
for the following three weeks...
...so she and her friends could go to Chiapas...
...to deliver food, clothing and medicine.
Beer! I want a beer!
Condoms!
- Where's your size?
- In the deli, with the giant salamis.
After Puebla, just take the back roads...
...the landscape is a total killer.
Got it.
Then follow this road.
That's not a road, a**hole, it's a river!
- Fuckin' river.
- Which way do we go, man?
Take the road to Oaxaca...
...but watch out for roadblocks.
Hide your Buddha where they can't find it...
...and drive like a saint.
Saba, we're in a hurry!
Totally!
It's trippy. You drive by
this massive Coke bottle...
...there's this cow, remember I told you?
- And then what?
- What?
- The beach, a**hole!
- Right. Just look for this dirt road...
...follow it to the end. There it is.
Hello? I'll be right down.
Grow up, a**hole!
Don't kick my car!
So, what do you do?
What do I look like?
- Sociologist.
- Cold.
- Philosopher.
- Cold.
- Psychologist.
- Do I look like that?
- A Victoria's Secret model?
- Freezing!
We give up.
I'm a certified dental technician.
What's that?
They're the ones who suck out your drool
at the dentist's.
- Right?
- Yes.
- Why did you pick that?
- It wasn't my fantasy, okay?
When I played with my dolls...
...l didn't pretend to suck out their drool.
- Then why?
- I lived with my aunt who got sick.
I was 16, and I had to find work fast.
In four months,
I had a dental technician's certificate.
But what did you really want to do?
I never did very well at school.
All I wanted to do...
...was travel...
...and see the world.
I love taking trips.
On acid.
You've never been on a plane!
- I have!
- Three times, big deal.
You really thought I was a philosopher?
- You look like a thinker.
- And you're married to Jano.
Luisa was never comfortable at Jano's dinners...
...with his artistic and intellectual friends.
There was always someone,
whether with good intentions or not...
...who would press Luisa for an opinion
during their debates.
Her reply was always humble.
"I don't know about those things."
She often thought about
challenging the guests...
...to see if anyone could name
every tooth in the right order.
She never dared.
Hey Charolastra, send up some munchies.
- What's this...?
- Charolastra?
- What's this...?
- Charolastra?
"Charo" is kind of a Mexican cowboy,
so it's something like "astral cowboy."
Actually, Daniel didn't understand the lyrics
to this English song.
"Char- olas- tra, char- o- Io...."
But it was really Saba who came up with it
while on mushrooms.
So Daniel and Saba are both "Charolastras"?
But Saba is way into altered states...
...and expanding consciousness.
- You mean mysticism?
- No, drugs.
He's drifting away.
We hardly ever see Daniel
since he came out of the closet.
That bothers you?
It's not that. He's just into other things.
But he's still in the club.
There's also Pecas,
but she's only an honorary member.
- She wouldn't sign our manifesto.
- You have a manifesto?
- Sure.
- What does it say?
Top secret.
- Can't tell you.
- We'd have to kill you.
"One. There's no greater honor
than being a Charolastra.
"Two. Do whatever you feel like.
"Three. Pop beats poetry.
"Four. Get high at least once a day.
"Saba's proposal, not mandatory.
"Five. You shall not screw
another Charolastra's girl.
"Six. Whoever likes Team America is a fag.
"Seven. Whacking off rules!
"Eight. Never marry a virgin.
"Nine. Whoever roots for Team America- - "
- You said that.
- It's worth repeating.
- "Ten. Truth is cool, but unattainable."
- What?
"The truth is totally amazing,
but you can't ever reach it.
"And eleven. The a**hole
who breaks any of the previous rules...
"...loses his title of 'Charolastra."'
You should give your manifesto
to the government.
Politicians are a**holes.
Julio and Tenoch told Luisa many stories.
Each one reinforced their bond...
...creating an inseparable entity.
Their stories, although adorned
by personal mythologies, were true.
But as truth is always partial,
some facts were omitted.
It was never mentioned how Julio lit matches
to hide the smell...
...after he used Tenoch's bathroom.
Or that Tenoch used his foot
to lift the toilet seat at Julio's house.
Those were details
one didn't need to know about the other.
Do you have girlfriends?
- Yes, Ceci.
- Ana Bananas.
- Bananas?
- Yes.
- Where are they now?
- Traveling around Europe.
- Really? Where?
- Mostly around Italy.
Supposed to be cool.
- You know why?
- Why?
Why do you think girls go to Italy?
- The clothes?
- For a vacation.
The men! Italians are awesome.
- You don't know our chicks.
- Fuckin' right!
Ceci would never cheat on me.
She wants to tattoo my name on her tit.
I took Ana's virginity.
I'm the only one she wants.
That's sweet. Your girls are lucky
to have such cool boyfriends.
Are Charolastras faithful?
Absolutely.
Good. As it should be.
Have you ever cheated on Jano?
Me, unfaithful? Please!
Has he ever cheated on you?
Jano has always needed reaffirmation.
- Really? Then....
- Go get some beers.
One for me, too.
- Where did you meet him?
- At a bar in Madrid.
I bet he was wasted.
He was sober. It was me who was wasted.
Me and my friends.
What happened?
I saw this sharp guy, full of attitude.
I guess I fell for his cute Mexican accent.
What did you see in him?
I don't know. We have a lot in common.
- Like what?
- Like...
...he has no father and I'm an orphan.
His mother is a ball breaker, just like my aunt.
My poor aunt. It was so sad.
I watched her waste away.
Jano was the only one there for me.
- Anyway, cheers!
- Cheers.
Would you like to order?
- s**t!
- The little one's for you!
- Spliff?
- Coming right up.
- Hey!
- What?
Do you think Ana and Ceci
are f**king any Italians?
No way!
There's piss all over. You really don't think so?
- No.
- Italians are fags anyway.
Totally.
Think your cousin wants to get laid?
Seems like Jano's
been cheating on her big time.
Maybe we can
heal her pain and make her happy.
- Let's go!
- What?
Guys!
Coming....
Still in bed?
Let's go. We'll never make it to the beach.
Come on, lazy s**t.
Let's go, Julio. The beach.
Now?
Cool! Early bird special.
But can you drive like that?
You won't even feel the curves.
It's high- grade dog s**t.
Very tasty dog s**t.
Sticky.
- You smoke a lot?
- Now and then. You?
- Not usually.
- A joint and a beer....
Tenoch realized he had
never visited Tepelmeme...
...the birthplace of Leodegaria Victoria,
Leo, his nanny...
...who emigrated to Mexico City
when she was 13.
She found work at Tenoch's family
and had cared for him since he was born.
He called her "Mommy" until he was 4 years old.
Tenoch did not share this with the others.
- Give me a little more.
- Here, got some for everybody.
- I saw you last night.
- What?
- You know what I'm talking about.
- No, what?
You think it's cool to spy on women
in their hotel rooms?
It was his idea.
Is that so?
And you just followed him?
You wanted to see me naked?
It wasn't that.
You wanted to see me naked and go whack off.
How can you say that?
Tell me something...
...have you ever had sex with girls
besides your girlfriends?
- A few.
- bulls**t!
He's only fucked his chick.
- You're wrong, a**hole!
- Who else?
Flavia.
That's bulls**t!
You blew your load putting on the condom!
You told me that!
A donation for the Queen?
- What about you, Tenoch?
- What?
Ever had sex with other girls?
- Two or three.
- Two or three skanks!
- What are skanks?
- wh*res.
- You go to wh*res?
- No.
Your Queen is very pretty!
- I'm not going to wh*res.
- For sure you are!
That's not true!
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye!
Did you f**k a lot of guys before Jano?
I started too late and met Jano too early.
You were a virgin?
No, I had a boyfriend before him.
And he gave it to you....
-Actually, yes.
-Really?
The first time, he took me to a factory...
...where his uncle worked as a night watchman.
I was so scared, I barely knew him.
I thought he wanted to kiss me...
...but he deflowered me.
It hurt so badly, I thought I'd never do it again.
But we did it every time we saw each other.
I thought he just wanted to have sex....
He also wanted to chat a little.
- He really fell in love with me.
- Who wouldn't?
He'd pick me up from school on his motorbike,
his bomber jacket....
- That's not very original.
- It was amazing.
I'd always play hooky....
Hooky?
That, too!
Playing hooky means cutting class.
I just wanted to be with him.
We'd go to the most beautiful places
on his motorbike.
We planned to go to the French Riviera.
Me, too.
A friend found him a job there as a waiter.
We were so excited.
He had a ponytail, a broken tooth...
...and an earring.
I was so in love with him.
So in love....
Then Jano the stud came along and stole you.
- No.
- So what happened?
He was killed in an accident.
s**t.
He was 17.
If they had passed this spot 10 years earlier...
...they would have encountered
a pair of cages lying on the road...
...and then driven through
a cloud of white feathers.
Five yards later, they would come across
a pile of broken cages...
...filled with bleeding chickens
flapping their wings.
And after that, a truck on its side,
still smoldering.
Beyond, they would see
two bodies on the road...
...one smaller than the other,
barely covered by a jacket.
And next to them, a woman crying inconsolably.
Give me a cigarette.
- Don't! This song rules!
- The batteries are dead.
Put the radio on.
- Hide the stash.
- It's cool.
Don't look at them.
Look, they got busted.
Don't look at them!
What's up?
Good heavens.
Look what just woke up!
Must be the heat.
You got a woody?
- And how!
- That little weenie?
Mine's only five millimeters shorter than yours.
Five millimeters? Dream on!
- You measured them?
- Yeah. His is butt- ugly.
- How so?
- It's got a freakin' hood.
- Yummy, hoods!
- You see?
The dude's got an ugly one.
How do you make love to your girlfriends?
- Super suave. Passionately.
- Lots of abra....
"Abra"?
Abracadabra.
But how do you turn them on?
First, a little foreplay, heat up the oven.
Some kisses on the titties,
a couple of love bites.
And then?
Then I ram it home.
What else?
I bang her till she begs for mercy.
That's it?
What else? Ceci twists and moans
like an oyster with lime.
- Ana cries.
- Poor thing.
- No, from pleasure!
- I can imagine.
- In the missionary position?
- Missionary, standing, doggie.
Ana likes to be on top, sitting down...
...even 69.
The whole Kama Sutra.
- Everything?
- Everything.
You ever wiggle your finger...
...up the a**?
a**?
When will it be ready?
Probably tomorrow.
Tomorrow? Where are we supposed to stay?
- Cool hat.
- It's a good one.
- Keep it.
- Really?
It's a present? Really?
- Yes.
- Thanks!
Thank you.
That's my name.
Luisita.
That's a pretty name.
Hi, Jano, I know you're not back until tomorrow.
I'm calling because I didn't leave you a note,
maybe to worry you.
I wanted to disappear from your life,
no warning. Gone.
Now I realize that's wrong.
So this is my note...
...but I don't even know what to tell you.
I met a woman named Dona Martina.
She's 98...
...and she remembers everything
since she was 5.
Imagine everything she's lived...
...and everything
you would never get a chance to live.
Your mother sent the mousse you like.
It's in the fridge.
Don't forget to pay the phone bill,
it's on your desk.
And pick up your shirts from the cleaners.
Don't go there anymore, they ruin your clothes.
Anyway...
...take care of yourself.
Get me some shampoo.
Please.
I'm sorry.
It's all right, come in.
Are you okay?
It must be the heat and the long drive.
Could we borrow some shampoo?
You got some?
Take off the towel.
What?
Take it off.
- The towel?
- Yes, the towel.
Don't hide it.
You get excited so quickly.
I guess.
You lied, it curves to the left.
What?
You said it curved to the right, but it curves left.
It's just like I imagined.
Why don't you stroke it?
Stroke it? Here?
Stroke it. Touch yourself.
Should I help you?
Do you want to see my tits?
Yes.
Only if you touch yourself.
Come over here.
Closer.
I'm so wet.
Do you want to feel me?
- Yes.
- Feel me.
Eat me, please.
But take my panties off first.
Come up here.
Mamacita!
I'm sorry.
Don't worry, it's all right.
Julio couldn't understand
what he was feeling. It wasn't rage.
The only time he had felt this pain
in his stomach was when he was 8...
...when he woke up thirsty one night,
and on his way to the kitchen...
...found his mother in his godfather's arms.
Julio walked away quietly
and never mentioned the incident to anyone.
What's up, dude?
Not much.
Feel like a race?
No, it's full of leaves.
We can clean them out.
Let's go.
You let me win, a**hole.
You didn't have to.
I fucked Ana.
What?
You heard me. I fucked your girlfriend.
Tenoch had only felt this pain
in his stomach when he was 11...
...when he saw his father's photo
on the front page of a newspaper.
The article linked him to a scandal...
...involving the sale
of contaminated food to the poor.
Tenoch and his family
moved to Vancouver for eight months.
He never questioned why.
No one told Luisa about Julio's confession.
Nevertheless, she noticed a great tension
between the two friends.
She assumed that her transgression
had disrupted a natural balance...
...that only she could restore.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Good night, Tenoch.
- You're not sleeping with Luisa?
- f**k off.
How many times did you f**k her?
Just once. We were really wasted.
- When?
- Forget about it.
- Tell me when.
- I don't know.
You don't know, a**hole?
When you went to Lake Tahoe.
And where was Cecilia?
Sick.
- Where did you do it? Her house?
- No.
Then where?
- I think it was at a party.
- What party, a**hole?
I think at Fruit Loop's place.
When Saba popped her cherry?
I think so.
- Why are you laughing, f**ker?
- About Saba....
Don't laugh, faggot!
- Who started it?
- Both of us. We were shitfaced.
Where'd you do it?
In the little sister's room.
What was Ana wearing?
I don't remember.
Skirt or pants?
- Which panties was she wearing?
- What?
- Which panties, a**hole!
- White ones.
- Did she blow you, pig?
- No, of course not!
- Look me in the eyes! Did she blow you?
- No.
- Did you eat her out?
- Of course not!
Did she come?
How would I know? It happened so fast.
- Did she like it?
- How am I supposed to know?
Did you like it, a**hole?
No.
I felt like s**t.
I wanted to tell you.
Go to hell, f**ker! You fucked our friendship!
You fucked my trust,
you fucked my girl, a**hole! You fucked me!
I'm the biggest loser,
bringing you comics from Lake Tahoe...
...and a dress for Ana, that slut!
That's fucked up.
I'm sorry, man.
I didn't mean it.
Didn't mean it?
You don't f**k a girl by accident!
You don't f**k her! Don't you see?
It went on like that all night.
Tenoch searched for every possible detail...
...trying to put together a puzzle
with pieces that didn't always fit.
While Julio molded these details
trying to create a less painful truth.
Dona Martina gave Luisa
the figure of the mouse with her name on it.
It had belonged to her granddaughter,
Luisa Obregon...
...who had died of a heatstroke 15 years ago...
...crossing the Arizona border with her parents,
seeking a better life.
Luisa thought that even after people die,
they are still present.
She wondered how long she would
continue to live in the memory of others.
But she preferred not to think about death.
Julio, you got a little hot, too?
Yeah.
The heat....
Where are you going?
Get back in front, girl!
I'm totally against this!
You came into my room, Tenoch...
...but it might have been Julio just as well.
What are you doing?
Think I'm your chauffeur?
Go f**k yourselves!
Easy.
f**king pigs!
- But Tenoch....
- Relax.
Me.
- My sandals.
- What?
Careful.
My panties.
Give it to me.
Feel me. Easy....
Look at me.
Wait!
- I'm sorry.
- It's all right.
Don't be that way.
Isn't this what you wanted?
Wasn't that your plan?
To take me away and screw me?
Wasn't that it?
So?
I'm stupid. You know what I should've done?
Not slept with either of you.
I never meant to hurt anybody.
You believe me?
- I'm sorry, all right?
- Yes.
Come on, let's go.
Me, too.
You, too, what?
Me, too, you faggot.
You, too, what?
I fucked your girlfriend, Ceci.
You did not.
- When?
- After the Plastilina concert.
Motherfucker!
That's why you dropped me off first?
- Where?
- In my house.
- In your house, a**hole?
- In my room.
- Panties with flowers.
- You slept with his girlfriend?
This a**hole also fucked mine!
- What about number three?
- Three?
Your manifesto,
not to screw each other's girlfriends.
- That's number five!
- Number five!
Get out of the car, f**ker!
I'm gonna rip you in half!
- f**k off.
- Open up, you faggot!
Cool it, guys!
Classic white trash, fuckin' peasant.
This f**king peasant is gonna rip your head off!
Don't make me laugh!
- Get out, f**king yuppie.
- Kiss my a**.
- Please, Julio.
- You stay out of this!
That's it! You can go f**k yourselves!
I'm such an idiot!
I thought you'd be different, but you're animals!
Your manifesto is a bunch of bulls**t!
Like idiots, breaking your own rules!
Typical men! Fighting like dogs
and marking their territory.
What you really want is to f**k each other.
That's what you want!
Who cares who you two fucked,
when you come that fast!
Play with babies
and you'll end up washing diapers!
You see?
- Open up!
- You did it!
- She's leaving.
- It's your fault!
How could you f**k my Ceci? That slut!
- Now we're even.
- Even, my a**!
Get down on your knees
and beg forgiveness like I did last night!
- Okay, I'm sorry.
- On your knees, a**hole!
Get over it, man, she's gonna catch a ride.
Come out and kneel down.
Step back.
If you want me to get out, step back.
- Further back!
- I'm not gonna touch you.
- Okay, I'm sorry.
- Both knees.
- I'm sorry, for God's sake.
- Sorry for what?
I'm sorry I fucked your girlfriend, okay?
- Okay what?
- Get over it, let's go get her.
- How many times did you f**k her?
- Once, what do you think I am?
Let's get this straight.
We're going to the beach together...
...but your friendship means s**t to me!
- It was already s**t to me.
- f**k you!
- Luisa, get in!
- Come on.
- Luisa, get in!
- Come on.
Kiss my a**!
I'm catching a bus to Puerto Escondido.
To hell with you and your Heaven's Mouth.
- We want to go with you.
- So you can fight like dogs? No, thanks.
- We promise, we won't fight.
- We swear on it!
I don't want to be on a deserted beach
with a pair of a**holes.
- We admit we're idiots.
- We'll do whatever you want.
- You'll be the boss.
- We're almost there!
We're really close!
If I come, we do things my way.
- Okay?
- Deal.
One more fight and I'm gone for good.
Whatever you want.
- Now we play by my rules.
- Yes, sure.
I'll make my own manifesto!
You totally lost it, Julio.
One. I won't screw either of you.
You can screw each other if you like.
Two. I'm going to sunbathe naked.
I don't want you sniffing around like dogs.
Three. I pick the music.
Four. The moment I ask,
please shut your mouths.
Five. You cook.
Six. No stories about your poor girlfriends.
Seven. If I ask, stay 10 yards from me.
Or better 100.
Eight. Obviously, you do all the manual labor.
Nine. You may not speak of things
you don't agree on.
Even better, just keep your mouths shut!
And ten. You're not allowed to contradict me.
Much less push me!
Julio and Tenoch had clearly no idea
where they were...
...nor how to get to a place that did not exist.
Saba's directions were contradictory.
Fearing that Luisa would find out,
Julio turned right, onto a dirt road.
Julio and Tenoch thought Luisa was asleep.
They did not notice the fear that kept her awake.
Her fear had nothing to do with the darkness
or the surroundings.
Fried fish! Ceviche! Beer!
Jesus Carranza, better known as Chuy,
and his wife Mabel...
...were the fourth generation
of a family of fishermen.
They lived nearby in San Bernabe,
a nature preserve.
Chuy offered to give them
a tour of the beaches the next day.
He would charge them 350 pesos,
including food.
- Can I drive?
- No.
- I know boats, man.
- Go ahead.
- Just don't go too fast.
- I know boats, man.
- There! Great swimming beach.
- What's it called?
Heaven's Mouth.
Wow!
Lucero, leave the lady alone!
It's okay, she's teaching me how to swim.
- Let me help you.
- It's okay, I got it.
Go swim with your buddy. The water is warm.
Let's see you float like a corpse.
Wow, she's really dead....
He's a crybaby,
he whines all night and wakes up Mommy.
He only stops crying when I hold him.
He just likes being with his sister, so pretty.
She has your eyes, Mabel.
You should have children, ma'am.
You're good with them.
You're just the right age.
He fell asleep. What do I do?
Ramon passes,
Zepeda rushes down along the sideline...
...and the stadium goes wild!
Stolen by the Emperor. What a player!
Still waiting for the guest of honor, the goal.
Shoot, dammit!
A pass to Cuauhtemoc...
...who cuts to the middle, to the goal...
...he shoots and...
What a save!
Saved by Campos!
The great goalie!
A national hero!
What?
Don't you like Campos?
Do you ever wish you could live forever?
Sure.
Wouldn't it be great?
At the end of the year, Chuy and his family
will have to leave their home...
...to make way for the construction
of an exclusive hotel...
...to be built on the nature preserve
of San Bernabe.
They will relocate
to the outskirts of Santa Maria Colotepec.
Chuy will attempt to give boat tours...
...but a collective of Acapulco boatmen...
...supported by the local Tourism Board,
will block him.
Two years later,
he'll end up as a janitor at the hotel.
He will never fish again.
Holy s**t.
What the f**k....
Step on it, Chuy!
Get the f**k outta here!
They're s**tting in the tent!
Not that way! This way!
There's still a pig in here!
Out! Yes, you!
You're throwing s**t at me!
Beat it, bastards.
The pigs rendered the campground
uninhabitable.
Julio and Tenoch
decided to spend the night in San Bernabe...
...where Chuy offered them a room
with electricity and water for 75 pesos.
Luisa looked forward to a shower,
even with cold water.
They would return the next day
to strike the camp.
The 23 pigs had escaped from a nearby ranch.
Over the next two months,
14 would be slaughtered.
Three of them
would provoke an outbreak of trichinosis...
...among those who attended
a festival at the Chavarin Ranch.
I don't know,
tell your mother whatever you want.
Let me talk or I'll hang up.
Thank you.
I was going to leave anyway...
...your confession just made it easier.
I thank you for that.
This is not about revenge.
I always knew about your affairs. With Carmen...
...and that girl from Barcelona....
I always knew everything.
I only hoped you would change, that's all.
My decision has nothing
to do with that, believe me.
I can't explain it now,
but soon you'll understand.
I don't blame you.
There's nobody to blame.
Of course I don't hate you!
And please, don't hate me.
Listen to me!
I called to tell you that I love you,
and that you were my whole life.
I don't expect this to be a happy farewell,
but maybe a tender one.
Calm down, please.
Listen....
Did you notice I hardly took any money?
I have more than I need.
I left my keys in the kitchen, with the spare set.
Don't lose the closet key, it's the only one.
I took your Ibiza T- shirts...
...you know I love to sleep in them.
Anyway, I hope you'll learn to be happy, okay?
I am now.
Take care of yourself. Goodbye.
To all of Jano's mistresses!
- You know how I knew?
- How?
He tried things on me that he learned from them.
- Like the finger in the a**?
- For example!
- No s**t!
- But you have to know how.
Delicately, with finesse.
Don't just jam it up there.
Jano was a master of finesse.
- To the master of finesse!
- To Jano!
To Jano, wherever he may be.
I loved meeting you, really.
Sometimes, you're complete a**holes...
...but basically, you're pretty cool guys.
Fuckin' right!
You're so lucky to live in Mexico.
Look, it breathes with life.
- To Mexico!
- To Mexico! Magical! Musical!
- Hey, are you friends again?
- No way!
Go on, make peace.
So I'm white trash, a**hole?
Total f**king white trash.
That goober you spit at me!
- f**k you, it's my car.
- And I'm some f**king yuppie?
Okay, a preppie.
But you love coming to my house,
social climber!
Only to get a taste of what your old man robs.
Isn't your dad an honest man?
Yeah, right!
What idiots! Now you're friends again.
To the Charolastras!
- Beer, anyone?
- Make sure they're cold.
Of course!
- Luisa....
- What?
- I'm sorry I pushed you.
- You should be!
- I know.
- Give me a kiss.
Forgiven.
- Luisa, tell me the truth.
- Truth.
Who of us f**ks better?
You crack me up.
Despite the fiasco,
you each have your own charms.
But who made you feel better?
When he comes, he says "Mamacita"!
But Julio, you cross your eyes.
You both have to quit whacking off
and work up your resistance.
- I bet he came before me!
- Both of you, stop whacking off.
We can't! Number seven in the manifesto!
Eliminate it.
Chuy, nothing like tooting the old horn.
- To spanking the monkey!
- Leave the monkeys alone.
Until you learn how to f**k properly.
While we're on the subject....
These boys don't know
how to go down on a girl.
- I never got the chance!
- I'm sure you're as green as he is.
You were slurping like this was a lollipop.
You have to be gentle.
You must make the clitoris your best friend.
- What kind of friend is always hiding?
- What you seek, you find.
The greatest pleasure is giving pleasure.
Absolutely. Hail the clit!
- To the clitoris!
- To the clitoris!
Truth.
- Swear to me, the truth.
- Truth.
Did Ceci blow you?
The truth is....
She bites a little.
She did blow you!
- Does Ana bite, too?
- No, she gives real nice head.
- You said she didn't blow you!
- Just the tip.
She missed the main course.
Chuy, don't blowjobs rule?
To blowjobs!
Since we're spilling our guts...
...l fucked Ceci a few times.
No big deal. I poked Ana a bunch of times.
- Yuck, I've been stirring your vanilla!
- Me, too.
So we're milk brothers!
Those poor girls, I feel sorry for them.
Chuy, this a**hole fucked my chick!
But he comes lickety-split.
To your girls, who are probably
screwing 10 Italians as we speak!
Let's toast!
- To Luigi!
- To Francesco!
Do you have some coins?
- Who wants the worm?
- I'll take it.
And your mom, too.
Are you kidding?
For real. The day she cleaned my aura.
Are you serious?
Totally!
To mothers!
What do you wanna hear?
I need a number and a letter.
Number 13.
- The letter B.
- B- 13.
Past Heaven's Mouth, you'll find Palicata Bay.
- Santa Rita is around there.
- And Chacagua.
Beautiful names. What do they mean?
Who knows?
Morning, sleepy head.
Want some eggs?
- A little shrimp soup?
- Please. And a beer.
The best cure.
I gotta get going. I promised my sister the car.
That's fine.
- How's that....
- Chacagua.
Is there anything beyond Chacagua?
Amaranto and Playa de Oro.
Very pretty waves,
but lots of people drown there.
The sunsets are beautiful, though.
- Another shrimp soup, please.
- No, thanks.
I better get going. My folks will start to worry.
Julio also has to return the car to his sister.
I'll stay here with Mabel.
They'll show me some beaches.
- I'm hungry, Mom.
- Here, have some.
At 1:00 p.m., Julio and Tenoch
began their journey back home.
It was a very quiet, uneventful trip.
Their families never knew
about the trip to the beach with Luisa.
She stayed behind...
...to begin her exploration of the local coves.
The last thing she told Tenoch and Julio was:
"Life is like the surf,
so give yourself away like the sea."
After returning from Europe...
...Cecilia and Ana
broke up with Tenoch and Julio.
Two months later,
Tenoch started dating his neighbor.
Nine months later,
Julio started dating a girl from his French class.
Julio and Tenoch stopped seeing each other.
The following summer,
the ruling party lost the presidential election...
...for the first time in 71 years.
Julio ran into Tenoch on the way to the dentist.
Going for a cup of coffee was easier
than making excuses to avoid it.
Have you seen Saba?
No, but I heard he's living in a hippie town.
Cool. Good for him.
- Daniel?
- Total queen at this point.
His dad kicked him out.
That sucks.
No, the f**ker's happy.
Got a boyfriend and everything.
That's cool.
- I got accepted at the University.
- Cool. When do you start?
- In September.
- Economics?
Yes. And you?
Biology. I start next week.
- That sucks.
- Community college starts earlier.
Did you hear about Luisa?
No.
What?
- She died.
- No way.
- Anything else, guys?
- No thanks.
How?
Cancer.
She had it all over.
Right there, in San Bernabe,
a month after we left.
Chuy called Jano. And that's it.
Wow. That's terrible.
She knew all along.
She didn't want anyone to know.
Luisa spent her last four days
in the hospital in Santa Maria Colotepec.
At her request,
Chuy and Mabel never mentioned...
...her adventure with Julio and Tenoch.
She gave Lucero
the little stuffed mouse named Luisa.
Tenoch excused himself.
His girlfriend was waiting for him at the movies.
Julio insisted on paying the check.
They will never meet again.
- See you.
- Sure.
Check, please.